ah, it's been awhile since i recorded anything, but last night's dream was weird enough to motivate me to start typing.

most of it was vague as soon as i woke up, but the basic situation was that i was caring for some small building in texas. somehow, texas was beseiged by flooding, terrorist attacks and war damage all at once. the building i was caring for was suddenly flooded, without electricity and falling apart in places. i was totally distraught and gave up trying to fix anything. instead i cried and thought about where i'd escape to outside texas. the owner of the house eventually showed up and got irate with me for neglecting to even try to save the house. he explained that there was an alien in the refrigerator downstairs that was dead and the body completely rotten now because i hadn't tried to get the electricity working again. not only that, a man had been locked in the closet with the refrigerator with the alien inside, and i had not done anything for that man, so he was dead now too. i felt dreadful.

somehow this sequed into looking at houses with my parents in new mexico. they found some grand victorian house in ruidoso that was only 100,000 dollars. i wanted the house myself, so i convinced my parents that avram and i could paint the inside blue, which the realtor explained would make the house worth 200,000. a volunteer from the radio station here was somehow involved in the sale of the house, and i felt upset that he was helping my parents find a house but never showed any interest in me.

some other dreams i've had recently: one in which i was trying to retrieve a bag from the kitchen closet, which was full of black widows that dangled from strings and drifted like sinister acrobats towards my hand wherever it went.

another in which some sort of fungus was devouring my abdomen. it looked like there were small furry caverns growing from my belly button outward, and i didn't know how to cure it. i knew the disease had come from our now deceased kitten, so i was afraid it would kill me too and didn't let anyone know i had it.